In Vancouver, snow is on the street and a stench is in the air. Finding the source of a stink wouldn’t be a concern for most, but I’m an odd guy so it was a preoccupation of mine during the holidays. And wouldn’t you know it, I tracked the foulness down to a condo ad. An ad for Success Tower at Pinnacle Centre.
Success Tower — the wealthy uncle of Mississauga’s Mediocrity Mews — is a condo in Toronto marketed to us saps here in Vancouver. It’s a strange appeal that reflects the insanity of real estate on the west coast. Priced out of English Bay? It’s time to look at Bay Street!
It gets worse. The marketer, Anson Realty, can’t resist the urge to hype its tower with all the gusto reminiscent of the glory days of Platinum Project Marketing. Consider these howlers of condo crap copy:
You’ve worked hard to achieve what you desire in life, and now you are within reach of the ultimate symbol of success. Success Tower at Pinnacle Centre.
At Pinnacle Centre, Success is an address. It is where you belong.
Wow, that reeks and that’s just off the website. Who knows what you’ll find in the sales centre. But let me tell ya, if success is an address, what does this say about those who bought into Woodward’s?
Here’s hoping 2008 brings us better ads, better homes, and most importantly, better affordability. Happy new year everybody.