Point of no return

Red Point Squamish

So let me get this straight. Hiking equals trees. Après hiking equals granny smith apples in a dish. Red Point is a condo and townhouse development in Squamish. As great as the forest is, the fruit bowl in the kitchen is even better.

Right.

If this is the kind of logic game that excites you, then I’d encourage you to register to learn more about the “adventure homes” at Red Point.

Sotheby’s International Realty Canada is the “exclusive offerer” of Red Point. Sotheby’s, we are told by their copy, is a name “synonymous with quality.” I like to think of them as the antonym of modesty.

The autioneer’s pompousness clearly shows in the marketing of the development. The name Red Point is a metaphor for rock-climbing success. “From hiking to biking, from kite surfing to beach walking, Red Point isn’t just a place to call home. It’s your home base for an exceptional life.”

I’d like to hear someone spew that spin in conversation and not get themselves laughed out of the room. Imagine your buddy Joe telling Mary, “It’s not so much a townhouse as it is a home base. For all my adventure needs. It’s exceptional, really.”

In mentioning Joe and Mary, I owe a debt to the Red Point Living Blog where the characters were first introduced. In typical corporate-blog fashion, this blog is dead on arrival. Launched August 10, the thing boasts two posts — the first of which consists of “content” that begs readers to “visit the blog often.”

For those who kept checking the blog for the next ten days, nothing would be there to warrant the visits. However, on the eleventh day, Red Point’s director of sales comes out of hiding to pony up deep thoughts about how “it’s better to buy real estate and wait than to wait and buy real estate.”

Anyone looking for a name synonymous with hype?

7 Responses to “Point of no return”

  1. solipsist Says:

    Anyone looking for a name synonymous with hype?

    No, but how ’bout tripe? It takes a lot of guts to spew such nonsense, it takes strong tripes to digest it, it stinks just like it, and it even rhymes!

    Just don’t change the name to condotripe.

  2. Viscera Says:

    Don’t you think you’re grasping just a wee little bit here??

    I live in Squamish and I really don’t find this ad remotely off-base. While we might not speak in the specific ‘ad lingo’ that you so readily mock, our neighbours and I, who live in relatively new single family homes not that far from this project, do actually more or less express this sentiment on a fairly regular basis.

    My neighbour across the street moved here so he can kite surf after work everyday. Which he does. My neighbour next door is an off-road mountain bike freak as well as a forester. Oh, and my other neigbhour is a former logger who is now working on the Sea to Sky expansion project. Me, I just like coming home from my job in the city to a truly beautiful home where I hear owls every evening, and the roaring rush of two rivers pretty much 24/7. Guess we’re buying into the stereotype, eh?

    Having visited the sales centre, I would agree that that this developer is offering a rather nice specification package. I don’t really understand what you’re beef is. Have you ever been there? Have you toured any real estate north of West Van in the last two years? When’s the last time you even drove through Squamish and did more than simply acknowledge the McDonald’s?

    No, I haven’t bought there. No, I don’t work for them in any way shape or form. Yes, I’m a city transplant. Yes, I enjoy the Squamish lifetsyle that you find so cynically laughable.

    Guess that makes me one special dufus, doesn’t it?

    shrug

  3. csg Says:

    Squamish is an awesome place to live if you’re into outdoor recreation. This is the best selling point for these places, so I’m not sure I can begrudge the marketer for trying to leverage that.

    “Home base for an exceptional life”, though … ouch!

  4. R.R. Says:

    Sotheby’s is synonymous with lame….But I have to agree that I’d pay that much for a decent property like this in squamish. The ad campaign might be a bit over the top suggesting the kitchen is cooler than B.C.’s own backyard but where I live there are crackheads and hookers. And the sold out and unfinished condo tower across the street has already appreciated to over $350k (for the cheapest apt. – outside of downtown as well…) despite being a year behind schedule.

  5. sgt.turmeric Says:

    Is the bowl of granny smith apples in a condo ad like the brick wall/chainlink fence/railroad track in a rock band photo?

  6. landlessinvan Says:

    I just have to say one thing to Viscera. You need to do a bit of homework if you think you are listening to owls every evening. Yes, a couple small owl species yet thrive in the Sea to Sky. But what the BC Provinicial government has allowed to occur throughout the province is scandalous.

    Spotted owls are essentially gone from our forests, along with their habitat. Thank god the Squamish pulp mill closed down, so now you can enjoy your town, with the convenience of Wal-Mart and a wide highway.

  7. condos for sale Says:

    Squamish is cool place. I don’t know the condo market there but I like the town.

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